Author: Steve Bloom

October 20, 2014

The World is Getting Better – Not Worse

I hear a lot of people complain about how messed up the world is. I get it. I truly do. War, poverty and crime are continuing troubles. Our leaders seem incapable of doing anything right and, all the while, problems keep mounting ever higher.

That’s one way to see the world. It’s not my way though.

I’m one of those few people online who actually admits to paying attention to the news on a regular basis. It seems to be a common fad to condemn the news media as a purveyor of negativity and pessimism. They’re often accused as being a source for sad stories that only serve to make us feel bad.

But the news never makes me feel pessimistic about the state of the world – it just doesn’t. That’s because I don’t pay attention to individual stories as much as I do the overall trend of where the world is moving. And if you look at the data, you’ll see that there are many reasons to feel hopeful and optimistic.

You have to look at trends over time to see just how much better the world is becoming. Let’s look at some of the data:

Health and Well-Being

Average life expectancy worldwide in 1960 was 52.48 years. By 2012 it has increased to 70.78 years.

According to the Global Hunger Index, global hunger has decreased 39% since 1990.

Extreme poverty (living off $1.25 a day or less) affected 43.1% of world population in 1990. Today it is 20.6%. There are even serious talks between governments about eliminating extreme poverty permanently.

Freedom and Self-Determination

According to Freedom House, in 1975 there were 41 free countries and 63 not free (the rest were in the middle). By 2013 the numbers had reversed. Now, 90 are free and only 47 are listed as not free.

Education

In 1970, 37% of people worldwide were illiterate. Today it’s just 15%.

The number of years people spend in school increased in developing countries from 1.7 years in 1950 to 7 years in 2010.

Crime and Conflict

Crime in the United States has dropped year after year to low rates we haven’t seen since the late 1960s. The crime rate is getting better all over the rich world, not just the U.S.

War has decreased too. In the past decade we’ve averaged 55,000 deaths a year from war (both civilian and military). But that’s lower than the 1990s (100,000 a year) and way lower from 1950 to 1989 when the average was 180,000.

More Evidence the World is Getting Better

Not convinced yet? How about improved access to clean water, sanitation and internet usage? How about the fact that the freedom of press is getting better too?

Need more?

How about the better child mortality rates, maternal mortality rates and death rates from cancer?

I could go on – seriously, there are dozens more pieces of good news I could add – but looking up and linking to all this information is tiring me.

When you actually look at the trends, it’s hard to not see anything but a brighter future ahead of us.

None of this is to suggest we don’t currently have any problems. There is still crime and violence and a world completely without war is a long way away. Obesity, the high cost of healthcare and education are growing problems too.

But even then, I remain optimistic.

Today’s problems may seem insurmountable. It may seem like we’ll never find a solution to them.

But our past is littered with problem after problem that seemed just as impossible to solve at the time. Yet each one eventually was. Here are some examples:

During the cold war, communism and the fear of nuclear annihilation was a constant threat. But now that the cold war is over, that threat has vanished.
When I was young, contracting HIV/AIDS was a death sentence. Today, because of new medicine, people can live full lives with the disease.
People talk about war a lot, but what about the progress for peace? The conflict in Northern Ireland lasted for 30 years until a resolution was finally found. There’s astounding progress in peace talks happening in Colombia right now that is ending a 50 year old conflict there.

All problems have solutions. Just because something seems difficult and insurmountable today doesn’t mean it will never be solved. There’s always something around the corner coming to fix even the biggest of problems.

The world isn’t a perfect place. Stupid, terrible people will continue to do stupid, terrible things. Problems will linger because others don’t have the courage or fortitude to do what’s right.

But there are far more people who are working to make this world a better place. Remember – we’re talking about a world community that eradicated smallpox from the earth and found peace in Europe shortly after two world wars decimated the populations.

There will always be things going on in the news to make you think the world is getting worse. A war might break out or a new potential disease is making headlines.

But for every war that breaks out, two stop. For every disease that comes around, we discover new treatments for others.

That’s progress. Just make sure that when you see the one step backwards, you don’t miss the two we took forward.
photo credit: Bethan

October 9, 2014

The Lies Your Mind Tells You that Hold You Back

Steve Bloom 15 Comments

It’s amazing how often our minds lie to us.

We’ll think of excuses to not do something instead of admitting it’s procrastination.

We’ll try to justify bad choices rather than call them mistakes.

Then there are negative thoughts and beliefs telling us what we can’t do.

Why do we let this happen?

Lies are usually told to avoid trouble or as a way to get something from another person. There’s really no reason to lie to ourselves. You’d think that we’d always want to tell ourselves the truth.

And there’s a big problem when it comes to lying to ourselves: it can hinder our growth and ability to improve our lives.

For example, when I graduated from college, I got a job in a big corporate office. After a few months of working, I realized I didn’t enjoy it as much as I expected.

But I kept telling myself that I would eventually get used to it. In my mind, the job was a good fit and I just needed to give it more time. If something was wrong, it was my attitude, not the job itself.

Unfortunately, I was just deceiving myself. One day I faced the truth that I hated working in the corporate world and had to find another line of work.

This repeated lie hindered my progress. It was the only thing keeping me in a job I hated. If I had just accepted the truth earlier, I could have done something about it sooner.

Truth is the First Step to Positive Change

Lies don’t do us any good. If something isn’t working, we should be honest. When we do something wrong, we should own the mistake.

It reminds me of a time when I was in middle school. Sitting next to a friend at lunch, he told me that when I get nervous or anxious, I bite my nails – something I didn’t even realize I was doing. Apparently the habit was getting out of control.

I was naturally embarrassed and didn’t want to hear it, but then he made a really great point:

He said it’s way better to hear the horrible truth from a friend rather than be unaware of a problem that needs to be corrected.

He was right. It was better to hear the embarrassing truth rather than have the problem continue.

Because he was willing to tell me the truth, I could do something about it; his honesty improved my life.

We all need to be our own best friend. We all need to be someone who is willing to tell the truth to ourselves even if it’s unpleasant or embarrassing.

Otherwise you may hinder personal growth and leave big problems unchecked.

Radical Self-Honesty

Let’s say you’re making excuses to not do something. Instead of being honest that you’re procrastinating, you’ll say you’re too tired or that the timing isn’t right.

Those excuses are lies masking the real problem: procrastination. They make a real problem more likely to continue.

Mentally you’re justifying your bad behavior which makes you more likely to do it in the future. After all, you don’t feel so bad about procrastinating when you have a reason to do it.

It’s easier to tell yourself that you like a job or relationship you hate rather than admit you don’t. That means facing an uncomfortable truth you’d rather not deal with.

But you have to deal with these things if you want your life to improve.

Lately I’ve started to watch my thoughts to see when I’m being honest with myself and when I’m not. My goal is complete self-honesty.

I won’t tell myself excuses or justify misbehavior. If I’m procrastinating, I will be honest about it. If I make a big mistake, I won’t try to cover it up. I’ll get rid of any self-limiting thoughts.

The goal is to be my own best friend who is willing to say things I might not want to hear. This will help me uncover problems so I can make improvements.

Be Your Own Best Friend

You need to take control over your thoughts and be honest. If you don’t, you’ll ensure that whatever you’re covering up continues to make your life a lot less satisfying.

After all, if no one comes around to tell you about a bad habit – whether it’s biting your nails or procrastinating – you may never know it’s there.
photo credit: gato-gato-gato

October 1, 2014

64 Amazing Quotes that Will Inspire You to Take that Risk

Steve Bloom 23 Comments

There’s more than one way to take a risk. To some people it means dropping everything to travel around the world. To others it means tackling a big project in the workplace.

But If you looked up the word “risk” in the dictionary, it would say something like this: To expose oneself to the chance of injury or loss; put oneself in danger; hazard; venture.

That’s hardly inspiring. It doesn’t encompass all the different ways you can put yourself out there. There are so many extraordinary paths we can take in life and each one involves risk in one form or another.

That’s why I find quotes on risk-taking so valuable. Life is so wide open and you never know where the journey will take you next. These quotes can open your mind to all the hidden possibilities around you.

So I want to share some of my favorite quotes about risk-taking. I hope you find them as helpful and inspirational as I do.

“If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat! Just get on.” – Sheryl Sandberg

“I always did something I was a little not ready to do. I think that’s how you grow. When there’s that moment of ‘Wow, I’m not really sure I can do this,’ and you push through those moments, that’s when you have a breakthrough.” – Marissa Mayer

“Pearls don’t lie on the seashore. If you want one, you must dive for it.” – Chinese proverb

“If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all you will have gained.” – Neil Gaiman

“If things seem under control, you are just not going fast enough.” – Mario Andretti

“Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it.” – Oprah Winfrey

“Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing.” – Denis Waitley

“Go out on a limb. That’s where the fruit is.” – Jimmy Carter

“Do one thing every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” – Bill Cosby

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” – Steve Jobs

“If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.” – Jim Rohn

“There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” – Aristotle

“If you don’t build your dream, someone else will hire you to help them build theirs.” – Dhirubhai Ambani

“Always go with your passions. Never ask yourself if it’s realistic or not.” – Deepak Chopra

“Leap and the net will appear.” – Zen Saying

“Think big and don’t listen to people who tell you it can’t be done. Life’s too short to think small.” – Tim Ferriss

“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

“The reward is in the risk.” – Rachel Cohn

“When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.” – Ellen DeGeneres

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

“Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

“Often the difference between a successful person and a failure is not one has better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on one’s ideas, to take a calculated risk – and to act.” – Andre Malraux

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might has well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.” – J.K. Rowling

“Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.” – Jack Canfield

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do, so throw off the bowlines, sail away from safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, Dream, Discover.” – Mark Twain

“Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” – George Addair

“Screw it, Let’s do it!” – Richard Branson

“I am thankful for all of those who said NO to me. It’s because of them I’m doing it myself.” – Albert Einstein

“Only those who play win. Only those who risk win. History favors risk-takers. Forgets the timid. Everything else is commentary.” – Iveta Cherneva

“No man is worth his salt who is not ready at all times to risk his well-being, to risk his body, to risk his life in a great cause.” – Theodore Roosevelt

“Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” – e. e. cummings

“You can measure opportunity with the same yardstick that measures the risk involved. They go together.” – Earl Nightingale

“It is better to risk starving to death then surrender. If you give up on your dreams, what’s left?” – Jim Carrey

“It is better by noble boldness to run the risk of being subject to half the evils we anticipate than to remain in cowardly listlessness for fear of what might happen.” – Herodotus

“You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition.You can’t get there by bus, only by hard work and risk and by not quite knowing what you’re doing. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover will be yourself.” – Alan Alda

“Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves.” – Walter Anderson

“Many a man is praised for his reserve and so-called shyness when he is simply too proud to risk making a fool of himself.” – J. B. Priestley

“Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive—the risk to be alive and express what we really are.” – Miguel Angel Ruiz

“When you play it too safe, you’re taking the biggest risk of your life. Time is the only wealth we’re given.” – Barbara Sher

“Everyone has a ‘risk muscle.’ You keep it in shape by trying new things. If you don’t, it atrophies. Make a point of using it at least once a day.” – Roger von Oech

“You have to be able to risk your identity for a bigger future than the present you are living.” – Fernando Flores

“It seems to me that people have vast potential. Most people can do extraordinary things if they have the confidence or take the risks. Yet most people don’t. They sit in front of the telly and treat life as if it goes on forever.” – Philip Adams

“It’s not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It’s because we dare not venture that they are difficult.” – Seneca

“If a man isn’t willing to take some risk for his opinions, either his opinions are no good or he’s no good.” – Ezra Pound

“I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.” – Pablo Picasso

“Don’t be afraid to take a big step. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps. – David Lloyd George

“The dangers of life are infinite, and among them is safety. – Goethe

“A man would do nothing if he waited until he could do it so well that no one would find fault with what he has done. – Cardinal Newman

“To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself. – Soren Kierkegaard

“When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap. – Cynthia Heimel

“I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. – G.K. Chesterton

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I… I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. – Robert Frost

“The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reason for remaining ashore. – Vincent van Gogh

“The most important thing to remember is this: to be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become. – W. E. B. Du Bois

“The young do not know enough to be prudent, and therefore they attempt the impossible—and achieve it, generation after generation. – Pearl S. Buck

“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go. – T. S. Eliot

“If you never budge, don’t expect a push. – Malcolm S. Forbes

“Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. – Cadet Maxim

“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better. – Samuel Beckett

“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” – Wayne Gretzky

“Anything I’ve ever done that ultimately was worthwhile…initially scared me to death.” – Betty Bender

“The function of man is to live, not to exist.” – Jack London
photo credit: A Syn

September 24, 2014

The Sherlock Holmes Guide to Success

Steve Bloom 24 Comments

Since Sherlock Holmes’ first story in 1887, he’s appeared in hundreds of adaptations. We’re all familiar with him to some extent. In fact, when we think of hard-nosed detectives, his name is usually the first we recall.

I remember seeing parodies of him in cartoons when I was a little kid. Even though I had never read one of his stories, I somehow knew who he was. He’s that ingrained into our culture.

So what makes him so memorable?

Sherlock Holmes is known for his eccentric behavior and dramatic mood swings. He’s constantly performing odd experiments and bickering with the various people that surround him. His personality is unique and stands out from most other characters.

But it’s more than that. When he gets involved in a mystery, he tenaciously holds on until all the clues come together. The way he works through problems and difficult tasks is endearing. We like him because he has admirable qualities that we want to emulate.

There are unique qualities that Holmes brings to each of his cases that makes him more successful than anyone else. And even though he’s only a fictional character, there’s a lot we can learn from him.

Here are some of the things he does that make him so successful:

1. Well-developed base of knowledge

Whether it’s knowledge about chemical reactions or how to analyze different types of soil, Holmes knows a lot about many subjects.

Having a large stockpile of information to work with can be very beneficial. When you’re working on problems, you’re more likely to come up with a solution. Often, the answer can be right in front of you, but you might simply miss it if you don’t have the correct knowledge to work with.

2. Sees things in new and imaginative ways

When Sherlock Holmes gathers clues, he’s not just looking at them individually. He’s also twisting and combining them together to form a picture in his head of what actually happened.

That’s creative thinking. When you can put pieces of data together to form a bigger picture, you’re using your imagination to stitch together a series of events. It’s about mixing and matching details into a coherent image in your head.

Holmes is especially good at recognizing patterns and making connections. He plays images in his head to give him a much bigger story than what’s directly in front of him.

You can see his creative imagination more clearly at the end of his cases once he’s solved everything. As he tells Watson the significance of each clue, he describes clearly how each one fits into the overall actions of the mystery.

3. He seeks new experiences

Sherlock Holmes’ life is never dull, even when he’s not out solving a mystery. In his free time, he’s always trying new things or working on some new bizarre experiment.

He thinks nothing of chasing people down the street or courting danger. His toleration of risk is higher than the average person.

By being able to tolerate risk and ambiguity, you’re more likely to test your boundaries. Seeking new experiences gets you out of your comfort zone and helps you understand just what you’re capable of accomplishing.

4. Driven by his own interest

Sherlock Holmes often turns down cases that don’t appeal to him unless something sparks his interest. He only seems to like particularly bizarre or difficult mysteries; ones that challenge him and push his skills in order to solve.

Holmes is intrinsically motivated in what he chooses to do. Rather than working on something for an external reward, he only tackles cases that challenge and excite him. What he likes most, is the work itself.

This is a great way to bring out your best work. We’re often at our best when we’re doing difficult tasks we’re passionate about and that push our abilities and knowledge to a higher level. Challenging work can be very engaging; being passionate about something can be very satisfying and fulfilling.

5. He keeps good company

The most successful inventors, artists and scientists from the past usually didn’t work alone. They had people who mentored, challenged and pushed them to do even more. Sherlock Holmes is no exception.

Sherlock kept Dr. Watson around so he could knock around ideas and work through problems. Just when Holmes seemed stuck on a mystery, Watson would say something that would make him think about a problem in a brand new way.

Don’t underestimate your creative support. The people around you can be extremely beneficial in idea generation or simply to keep your spirits up when you need them most.

Having someone around that you can confide in can help you come up with solutions to problems or ways to overcome obstacles. The right environment might be just what you need to get your creative thinking into a higher gear.
photo credit: dynamosquito

September 15, 2014

10 Hard Things You Need to Do to Live a Full Life

Steve Bloom 30 Comments

In order to get the most out of life, you have to do hard things.

Do things that frighten you or make you uncomfortable. Do things you always wanted to do, but didn’t think possible. Later in life, it’s these decisions that will mean the most to you.

We have the power to define our lives and determine our paths.

We can choose the path of least resistance. But avoiding hard things leads to stagnation and mediocrity. What good will it do if it doesn’t get us the most out of the time we’re given?

Then there is the path of most resistance. Face down all your fears and excuses so that nothing is standing in your way. Confront internal and external obstacles so that you get the most out of life.

Life’s short. You can’t spend too long in your comfort zone. It’s time to stop taking the easy path and do the hard things that will make your life a lot grander and much more fulfilling.

Here’s where to get started:

1. Move ahead by leaving the past behind

Most of us have things in the past that we wish had gone differently. Bad choices might have been made or opportunities missed. Memories of what might have been can haunt you and fill you with negativity.

Life isn’t meant to be lived in the past. That time is over. All you can do is accept what has happened, learn from your mistakes and move on. You can’t jump fully into the future with one leg still stuck in the past.

2. Be who you are – not who the world wants you to be

We all want to be liked and accepted by the people around us. We’re social animals and want to feel like we belong.

But this need to fit in can make it difficult to figure out who we are as individuals. At some point, we have to make our own way – one that’s more true to ourselves.

Never sacrifice who you are simply to fit in or only because it’s expected of you. At best, you’ll feel frustrated. At worst, you’ll feel like you’ve turned your back on an important side to your personality.

3. Distance yourself from negative thinking

We are often our own worst critics. It’s amazing how harsh our thoughts and ideas about ourselves can be. Negative thinking can infect your mind like a virus and undermine your actions and plans; you’ll doubt yourself and feel pessimistic about everything you do.

Having faith in yourself is extremely important if you want to get anywhere in life. The whole world can doubt you as long as you believe in what you’re doing. But the minute you let negative thinking inside and undermine your actions, you’ve already lost.

4. Live an “examined life”

“The unexamined life is not worth living.” – Socrates

Life is more than a daily routine with the biggest question being what we’ll have for dinner that night.

There are so many bigger questions to think about. What’s the meaning of life? What does it mean to be human? Why is the world the way it is? What’s my purpose of living?

These questions guide us and provide deeper awareness. It’s about looking closely at ourselves and the world around us to get a greater understanding about the meaning of it all.

5. Recognize that every moment of your life is slowly slipping away

I like to think of time as the constant “click, click, clicking” of the second hand on a clock, steadily moving forward and slipping away forever.

It’s easy to dismiss those small increments of time as too short and insignificant to matter. But each click represents a distinct moment of time that’s too precious to ignore.

And really, that’s all life is: a series of moments. Our task is just to recognize what to do with each of those moments so we spend those clicks wisely.

6. Worry less about what people think of you

As you go through life, you’ll meet many naysayers, doubters and judgmental-types who want you to care what they think. But caring too much what others think will only slow you down – you’ll start to watch your steps – you’ll be less ambitious and take fewer risks.

Letting go of the worry about what people think of you is freeing. You’ll take more actions and follow your dreams without the added concern of what others are thinking.

7. Stop looking for external recognition

It’s an innate human desire to be recognized. We all want others to notice how smart or talented we can be. But this desired for recognition can be taken too far.

When our actions are too focused on recognition from others, we give power away.

Instead of doing something for our own personal satisfaction, we do it because it will please others. We perceive how well we do based on how they see things, not how we see them.

Look inward. Decide what makes you happy and what gives your life meaning. The only person you need to be accountable to is yourself. Don’t let others have power over your actions.

8. Understand that you get out of life what you put in

Life is a series of choices – each one building on the other. What we decide to do determines what we get out of out of the time we’re given.

Sitting on the couch all day long watching TV will rarely build up to anything worth mentioning later in life.

You have to do something in order to get more out of life. Take a long-shot chance on something or take that first step toward a crazy dream. All our decisions can build something memorable if we let them.

9. Stand up for yourself and what you want

Some people will walk all over you if you let them. They’re too concerned with their own personal gain to notice how it’s affecting you. Do not just let this happen.

Stand up for yourself and tell people when they’re doing something wrong. If you don’t let the people around you know what you want, they’ll never know.

10. Develop mental toughness

Those who are tough enough to handle mistakes and failures are the ones who will do the most with their lives. They’re the ones who can bounce back and keep moving forward; they win simply because they don’t let anything stand in their way.

Don’t focus too much energy on avoiding losses; you’ll only end up avoiding risks and minimizing your potential. Focus more on being able to take the emotional hit of a major failure with little loss to enthusiasm. If you can experience the greatest failure in life and still keep moving forward, you will be unstoppable.
photo credit: kelsey hannah

August 21, 2014

Why I Spent a Small Fortune on a Risk with a 50% Chance of Success

Steve Bloom 26 Comments

In one afternoon, my wife and I spent an exorbitant amount of money on a risk with only a 50% chance of success.

The sum total – which my wife and I want to keep private – represented a large portion of our entire combined savings. It’s a huge risk, but, under the circumstances, one we’re both willing to take.

Before I get into what we spent our money on, I want to give a little back-story.

Three weeks ago, my wife and I celebrated three years of marriage. It’s been a long, crazy adventure. We’ve traveled, had some good times and even moved to the other side of the country together.

For the past two years, we’ve wanted to take the next step together and start a family. It’s been a lot more difficult than we expected. For some reason, nothing is happening.

We’ve both been examined thoroughly and no one can find anything wrong with either of us. Frankly, our problem has stumped doctors.

About a year ago, we started getting fertility help from specialists. We tried a series of relatively low-cost treatments, but after several tries, we got nowhere.

Now we’ve had to drop the big bomb on the problem. In order to get what we want, we have to use In-vitro fertilization (IVF) which is a long, specialized medical procedure. I won’t go into the specifics here, but – suffice to say – it’s a major treatment.

It’s also our last resort. Neither of us want to adopt at this time, so this is it for us. If it doesn’t work, we’ll likely be childless for the rest of our lives.

And that’s what we spent our money on recently – a last chance.

On the plus side, we used a new credit card with a signup bonus of 100,000 American Airlines miles so the next few flights we take will be free. It’s good to do some travel hacking, but I just wish it was under different circumstances.

Why We’re Doing It

This decision wasn’t easy. With all the money that goes into the procedure, you’d hope that the chances were a little better. Statistics say that our likelihood for success is 40-50%; I’m just being optimistic and saying it’s 50%.

That’s basically the flip of a coin.

Heads it works and we get what we want. Tails we lose everything.

But my philosophy of life tells me to take that risk. It’s our last chance to get something we both really want – we have to keep going despite the odds.

Sometimes life isn’t fair. The world will stack the deck against you, but that doesn’t mean you have to just roll over and take it. You have to keep going and fight with everything you’ve got to get what you want out of life.

If my wife and I gave up – if we had just accepted our circumstances and fallen short of everything we could have done, we would never have forgiven ourselves.

If we didn’t take this chance, we would always look back on this moment and wonder, what if…

There is a chance the coin will show tails and we’ll lose everything. We’re preparing ourselves for that possibility. At the same time, we’re preparing ourselves for success. It’s up to the coin now.

It’s funny. Sometimes I’ll hear people tell me about risks they want to take. They’ll say the chances are too slim or worry about what they might lose if it doesn’t work out.

It’s perfectly reasonable to turn down a risk if it’s not worth it. If my wife and I really didn’t want this as badly as we do, we would simply accept the situation as fate and live the rest of our lives in peace.

But when you want something so badly, can there be any other choice? Can you really live the rest of your life knowing that you didn’t take every single shot that you could have? The alternative is to live the rest of your life with that nagging feeling of what might have been – that’s not how I want to live.

If it doesn’t work out the way we want, we’ll both be very sad. However, we’ll hold our heads up high knowing that we gave it our all. We laid everything down on the line for what we wanted.

There are moments from my past when I didn’t give 100% to a goal I highly desired. When I look back now, I can only wonder what might have happened if I had done things differently. As I move forward in life, I realize just how important it is to give your most important goals everything you’ve got.

I want to end this post with an abbreviated excerpt from Rudyard Kipling’s poem “If—”

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss…

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son.
photo credit: Pauli Antero

August 14, 2014

17 Ways Travel Makes You a Better Person

Steve Bloom 21 Comments

One of the best aspects of travel is in discovery. Whether you’re immersing yourself in a brand new culture or wandering the streets of a foreign city, you’re finding new things to see and experience.

Part of that discovery is in what you learn about yourself. Like most experiences, travel can change you in ways you might never have expected. And as I look back on my trips, I realize just how many of them have changed me for the better.

Here are some of those ways:

1. Forces you out of your comfort zone

Travel means new foods, cultures and places to explore. Try speaking that new language or eat a new kind of food you never knew existed. When you’re thrown outside of your normal circumstances, you’ll discover more about who you are and what you’re like.

2. Time management

When you have only have a week or two to see a country, you have to manage your time so that you see as much as possible. This means estimating how long you think you’ll spend at each place and setting a proper schedule. Because of my travels, I’ve become especially good at estimating how long something will take.

4. Getting off the beaten path

Even if you’re traveling in a group, there’s usually enough time to get away to do your own thing. You’ll take that side street to see where it goes or walk into a small pub to make friends with locals. Breaking away from the norm is good since you’ll learn to live life how you want to, not just because that’s what everyone else is doing.

5. Seeing new ways of living

Nothing can be more eye-opening than surrounding yourself with another culture that chooses to live their life completely different from yours. That can give you a new perspective on how you live and make you see your life in ways you never considered before.

6. The chance to reinvent yourself

At home, people can see you a certain way and pigeonhole you into a personality type that can be hard to escape. Travel can give you a chance to explore other sides to your personality. You’re free to break away from how people normally see you and reinvent yourself.

7. Building confidence

You’ve just traveled across a country, tried a new language and haggled over prices in a market. They’re all things you didn’t know you could do before, but dug up a new-found sense of adventure and somehow made it work. With travel, comes challenges. And the more challenges you take on, the more sure of yourself you become.

8. Planning and organizing skills

What’s the best route to take so I see all the major attractions? What’s the best way to get to the next city and back so I don’t miss my flight? How should I organize my itinerary?

Travel is about making choices. You have to organize your trip so that you have a place to stay and transportation to and from certain destinations. Personally speaking, planning and organization takes up a huge chunk of time before I even arrive.

9. You become an interesting person

Travel is an opportunity to do things you might not otherwise get to do. Adventures from surfing, whitewater rafting or exploring a jungle will give you amazing experiences you’ll have for the rest of your life. It’s simple: do interesting things and you’ll always have an interesting story to share.

10. Living with less

It’s hard to carry a lot while traveling. At some point, you have to carefully examine what you actually need and leave the rest behind.

I’m always amazed at how little I can get by with when I travel. It teaches me that life can be lived a lot more simply – there’s surprisingly little we actually need to be comfortable.

11. Taking bad experiences in stride

While traveling, I’ve been swindled out of money. Two other times, I was with people when they were pick-pocketed. It doesn’t happen often, but occasionally bad things come up. When they do, it’s easy to become furious and let your emotions boil over.

But eventually you learn to just let it go because there isn’t anything you can do. Dwelling on it won’t solve anything so you learn that you have to let those negative feelings go.

12. Feelings of gratitude

It’s easy to forget just how lucky we are. We live in a world full of abundance and wealth and often never fully appreciate what we’ve been given.

Traveling to a poor country can make you realize just how much you actually have. I’ve made friends with people who have so little – much less than you normally see. It brings into perspective all those wonderful things I failed to appreciate.

13. Social skills

I’ve met people at hostels, guided tours, bars, cafes, monuments and buses. You can meet local people and other travelers – good people and bad, introverted or outgoing. Wherever you go, there’s the opportunity to get to know someone and make a new friend.

14. Flexibility & Adaptability

Recently when I was flying to Los Angeles, a flight was cancelled and I was stranded for a night in San Francisco. Suddenly I had to scramble to adapt plans and make last minute accommodations.

But rather than seeing it as a source of frustration, I saw it as an opportunity. After my wife and I got a place to stay, we hit the town. When you can change quickly to circumstances, you can get a lot more out of life.

15. Becoming comfortable with uncertainty and the unexpected

Trips don’t always go according to plan. There’s plenty that can go wrong to either derail your itinerary or force you to change your plans.

But as you travel, you realize that the unexpected is rarely as bad as you think. Often they’re just small obstacles that can easily be overcome. Eventually you become accustomed to uncertainty and the unexpected challenges that come your way.

16. You become smarter and more cultured

Whether it’s your goal or not, travel makes you smarter. All the things you learn about other cultures and people – their quirks, mannerisms and worldview add to what you discover about the country’s history and politics. Eventually you come away with a deeper understanding of a country just from being there.

17. There’s time to reflect on your life

As exciting as travel is, there are plenty of moments of downtime. Whether you’re on a train heading to your next destination or resting in your room, there are moments to pause and reflect. During those times, thoughts often go back to your life back home.

Being immersed in another country and culture can help you get into an outsider’s mindset on your life. It can give you a good insight into what you really want out of life and where it’s heading.
photo credit: Riccardo Romano